I feel the draw of heading out with only my daypack. Down to the bare essentials – journal, laptop, a few clothes, toothbrush. The feeling that everything, absolutely everything that I need is with me, on my back, is extremely liberating, a joyful playful lightness in every step.
The past two months I’ve spent based in Southern Oregon has been wonderful. I do mean wonder-ful – the landscape here is primordial, the dense deepgreen tree-covered mountains everywhere you look are reminiscent of Jurassic Park. The prehistoric landscape brings a deep sigh to the body. My muscles, cells and bones relax into the knowledge that actually everything is ok, we are all ok.
I have made many shifts in this time, learning more about myself and other humans. And I have cemented a friendship that will last a long time, with a beautiful heart-led powerful man. I am proud to be his friend, and discover new frontiers within us both as we journey. He shares my need to be outside, and I know we will adventure together on mountains, in forests and oceans. Thank you my friend for sharing the gift of your land and your heart with me.
And, it is time to move on to new places, both inside and outside. Tomorrow I will drive to Portland, and from there fly to Mexico. Currently I have only a one-way ticket, and I have a plethora of options of where to go from there. It is fascinating to have created this almost-complete freedom of location for myself. In previous times I would have been overwhelmed by the infinite choices, without a sense of myself to guide me. I relied more on external input, routines and employers to make decisions. Now I have absolute faith in and love of myself, and know without a shadow of a doubt that there are no wrong decisions, and I revel in the experience of infinite abundance this world offers if we have eyes to see it.
I stayed in San Francisco for many years with a voice screaming inside that I needed to be outdoors. It was a very painful experience to not act on that voice. But at the same time I did not love or trust myself. I had developed enough awareness and wisdom however that if I left simply to appease the pain, without fundamentally transforming my experience of myself, I would simply be trying to run away from myself. And so I stayed, and I chose the inner path to follow, the spiritual seeker path. It was not an easy one, but I never gave up. And eventually it did indeed lead me home to myself.
And so now I can travel freely anywhere, with only a daypack, experiencing deep joy and immense lightness of being with every step.
If you are on your own inner journey, I commend you, and in my experience it is absolutely worth it. Keep going. As William Blake said “The fool who persists in his folly will become wise.”
Trust your internal wisdom, learn to listen to it, and take the actions it guides you to. Transforming your experience of yourself to one of love, of absolute knowledge of your own self-worth, is fundamental and changes everything else. If I can be of help to you, reach out to me. I wish you all peace, magic, love, joy and PLAY in your life.